"Articulate punks!!"

In the course of our lives, some wise ass is always on the ready with a “saying” to show us how well educated his simple mind is, a couple of these “sayings” had me scurrying to the nearest café to figure out what this he-bitch was yappin’ on about, coz he had hit me with one of those….”he who finds a bride finds bullshit companionship blah blah blah…..” to hell with him, let me also pose on you with my sayings, and their meanings;

A house is not a home – This was a phrase coined by some jealous punk that had just been to Jim Muhwezi’s Rukungiri crib!! He told this to his sons, and it later became a popular saying for poor people everywhere!

A man who is his own lawyer has a fool for a client – A cleverly coined phrase made by a committee of lawyers that want us “fools” to always hire their greedy asses!

A penny saved is a penny earned – This was made by some Karamajong chick that was bitch slapped by the Kasese woman MP at a police station, what about???

A person is known by the company he keeps – Shit, I ought to stop hanging with those bar waitresses at Bamboo nest!

A poor workman blames his tools – This was recently amended to “a poor wank-man blames his tool”

A prophet is not recognized in his own land – Kagu!

Action speaks louder than words – Riots are better than parliamentary debates…………if only this saying was true!

An apple a day keeps the doctor away – If only Adam hadn’t fallen for this shit….coz that’s what the snake told him while on a leisurely stroll in the garden of eden, next thing he knew, he was toiling and sweating like a common groundhog on earth!

Beauty lies in the eyes of the beholder – amended to “beauty lies in the eyes of the beer holder!”

Better late than never – The guiding principle at the Ministry of Works pot holes division!

Behind every great man there’s a great woman – And behind that great woman is the great man’s dimes!

Crime doesn’t pay – So your JOB is definitely criminal…..what? …..You have dimes?.... Ok am sorry!

Do as Jesus would do – Could you please turn this here glass of water to wine?...You can’t??..What would Jesus do?

Do unto other’s as you would have them do to you – Damn, if I was a chick, I would do unto me what I would want current me to do unto she…..am lost, but u get the drift!

Don’t let the bastards grind you down – That is surely me, and they are telling you!

Don’t put all your eggs in one basket – Use a sack, if the basket is small!

Empty vessels make the most noise – All politicians!

Everybody wants to go to heaven but no one wants to die – Nice one!

Seeing is believing – This is unfair to Stevie Wonder!

The best things in life are free – Fuck Nakumatt!

The cobbler always wears the worst shoes – hhmm, wonder why?

The good die young – Man, we are not good!

When in Rome, do as the Romans – Amended to “when in Rome, do the Romans!”

Youth is wasted on the young – NICE!!!