Scientists and Religious chaps, especially those chaps from the Vatican, are always confusing us with their endless debates! They are now turning out to be like the power sharing agreements in Africa!
The Vatican church guys insist that God was just there chilling, and he decided to get clay to make some stuff, and then poof, some chap showed up, lets call him Adam! Then he looked for more clay but it was nowhere to be seen, so he figured, this chap’s rib has enough clay to make a chick! So he took 1, and then poof, there was Sheba!! I mean Eve!
Apparently the Vatican guys don’t tell us where the snake came from, probably from Adam’s testicles, coz they have a similar movement, and both tilt their heads upwards when they see an apple!! But this snake thingy was too sharp! So Adam was just there walking, thinking of which university to apply to, for his Masters degree, when he stumbled upon snake! He was like,
“Snake dude, the thirst is killing me, where do I find an apple or something”
“Dawg, walk down to the river side, u shall pass two mountains, then u will find a crater called navel, but pass by it too, then u shall find a bushy area down there, and that’s where the apples are”
“Thanks dude, now can u slither away, I gots me an apple to eat”
But alas, Sheba, sori, Eve was there too, and they shared the apple! Apparently it made them aware that they were naked! The sea of knowledge begun to stream in. So when God called Adam for a discussion on term limits for one to be God, Adam was like “hold up, I have to first go to Woolworths for some gear”
“How did u know about woolworths? Did u chow…sori eat the apple? U shall be cast out of my garden, u shall live on nothing but sin! Your great grandchildren will buy wetlands at 11 billion shillings, and their children will be involved in endless fighting for diamonds and monkeys in Congo! Go now, u punks, and suffer!!!”
The scientists however have still jammed this kabozi, they insist on some particles that were just moving within space, minding their own, then somehow they met! It was love at first night, coz these particles didn’t waste time, sijui dating and buying roses! One particle was like,
“Yo molecule, u must have a taste of this “chow” thingy, on account of it being some very good shit!!” And VOILA, man was made!! He went on to step on the moon, invade Iraq, and sing crappy songs like “Its all coming back to me noooooowwwwww!!”
We the lay people are still confused on who to believe, but when the Vatican declared a quarterly loss of 30 million dollars in the last quarter, due to the decline of the dollar, I decided to follow the scientists!!
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