Women have emancipated....almost!!

A KIU student hacked her chap to death using a knife, sometime on Thursday. Just like many other chicks, she had locked him out of their house, and asked him to go back to the “sluts” he had been with, a very popular stunt with chicks these days, coming a close second to smashing the windscreen of his car, which he got on loan, now he has to pay the loan interest plus a freakin windscreen that he didn’t insure.

The other day, the callous Tonku, murdered his chick and dumped her in a septic tank, then headed straight to Capital Pub for a “pint with friends”. Talk about having no conscience. Cab drivers narrated later that day that this chap was stinking of shit, they thought he was an employee of KCC, working in the “shit disposal unit”.

Just here here last year, a MUBS student was stabbed at workers house by her chap, before he slit his own throat, in a bid to have him and his chick reach heaven (or hell) at the exact same time, so they could share the same cubicle while waiting for that St Peter chap to unleash the “deadly book of sins”.

Now what the hell is going on around here? Usually, knives are for the purpose of applying jam to bread, or for cutting toe nails (if you are the gateman), or shaving yo legs and chest (if u are the gardener) or better yet for removing stains on jeans (yep, that’s my shit, what’s this washing stuff?)

In the old days, when chicks hadn’t started watching “Desperate housewives” and “Sex and the city”, it was common place for guys to have as many wives as their time would allow. Jacob Zuma and King Mswati are STILL living in these olden days, lucky punks!

If that KIU chick was Zuma’s babe, she wouldn’t be on that shit of “go back where u’ve been”, this guy would break the door open and bitch slap her to reality before she thought “knife!”, coz she would be his 6th wife. If she were a virgin, Mswati would be knockin on her door talking ‘bout “babe, I have chosen you, have any idea how lucky yo ass is?!”.

But no, this is Ug, women’s emancipation is spreading like a skin rash, and no laws shall act as the dettol or Protex. Chicks want to be entitled to ONE man, so the Electoral commission no longer has the monopoly to the slogan “ONE MAN ONE VOTE”, except now the chiks have replaced the word “VOTE” with the monologues, anything less than that, you face the knife, except the MUBS punk, he was a guy, that he-bitch! And that crazy bastard Tonku, spoiling our names.

Muslims chicks however, are still the hardest. These women demonstrated when the Marital bill was being presented in parliament seeking for a chap to marry only 1 chick. If all muslim chicks were in KIU (1 man 1 vote) ,the bill would have sailed through as easily as the removal of term limits, of course the bitches would have had to pay each MP just 5 million bucks, to make it easier. But no, these muslim chicks moved up and down town with banners of “we want to be 4 wives”, “1 man, 4 bitches!”, “The Holy Book gave me the right to share my man….and his diseases too!” and varying others, if only ALL chicks were muslim, the homicide department would have less issues, of course except for demented idiots like Tonku!

WBS needs to start documentaries of “crimes of passion”, coz the news these days is so full of this shit. If some chick hasn’t cut of some man’s genitalia (and kept the balls framed high up in her house as a winner’s trophy), some other chick is stealing babies from Mulago, so her man doesn’t leave her, another is burying dolls, so her man gives it another try, some campus chick is calling her sugar dad’s wife threatening her to “leave her man alone, or else…..”

We the advocates of “women emancipation” urge all women, that in a bid to be equals with men, shall do the following;

• Scrap the 1.5 points chicks get to enter campus, compete u she-buggers!!

• Start driving around campus giving bu boys mobile phones “to call u later!”

• Get married at age 37, and just for the sake of just!

• Marry 4 men without divorcing any, put them in different apartments, yours of course.

• Become bouncers at discos, heck, own a couple of ‘em discos.

• Start raping chaps!!!!!! Matter of fact, become a “wanted” serial rapist!!

• Remove women’s day, make every bloody day “women’s day”.

• Start a bible, with the Jesus character as a chick, and the 12 disciples as mugged bouncers!
• Scrap ALL condoms, sell only “femidoms”.

• Don’t allow a bugger’s name after marriage, let the punk take yo name godamit!! and the kids yo religion for Pete’s sake!

• Finally……start beating yo husbands!!! But just avoid using knives!