The chaps at Apple, no, not the stuff the snake made Adam and Eve share, before they got full knowledge that they had spent their entire lives doing kimaansulo for God, Jesus, and the chaps that used to watch E! on the TV stations back then, but Apple, the IT company, have unleashed a new product known as the iPad! Most of us (ok, just me and a couple of other broke fellaz) are still blasting on the iPod shuffle, the one of 512MB, made in 2005, and we are posing like a problem!
The good thing is, when you do a quick search on this so-called revolutionary widget, or gadget, you only land on jokes about this so-called phenomenal product, coz it does sound like a sanitary pad, hence;
“I’m not buying an iPad! Period!”
“They should have just called it the TamPod!”
“This gadget costs bleedin’ money!”
“Should I go to an Apple store or a feminine isle at the supermarket to buy an iPad?”
“After this, Apple is launching the iMaxiPad and iTampon!”
“How can I get one of these……no strings attached?”
“Don’t worry Steve Jobs, this will all be over in a small period of time”
“Hope there are no bugs with security. Wouldn’t want anything embarrassing leak from my iPad!”
“iPad, now with bleeding edge technology”
“iPad, helping people to deal with 24 hour news cycles”
Yeah, I know, don’t have to rub it in so much, but I never even thought of any of those, simply copied and pasted.
Ugandan posers will now be seen on facebook yapping about this new gadget as if it is ballistic. The thing looks like a laptop but quite thin, wonder how u shall be carrying it around the taxi park, with background lights and all, oh, it’s got a cover!! Ah what the hell, maybe u can afford the 500$, sawa, wish you the best in this new period of gadget wizadry!
Of course some chaps are out there defending this name, saying they should have made fun of mousepads too, and pads of paper, and that these are just like the usual lame fart jokes, but what the hell, those are the Ofwono Opondo’s of Apple, will say anything to make it (their employers) look better!
Speakin of new products, when was the last time anything was ever “unveiled” down here? Chaps at Jua Kali invented some shit that pounds groundnuts in seconds, but never to go to Serena for the “unveiling”, which probably explains why village chaps are still using pestles (remember that shit?) to break their backs in an attempt to make a meal, yet the gadgets were unleashed, but with no guarantees, so if you get shocked just trying to plug it to power, that’s entirely yo-wa shit!
Pepsi has been posing on us with “mountain dew”, complete with buses and mini buses runnin’ around town promoting “their new drink”, kumbe they are just bottlers. Coca cola has brought “Schweppes Novida”, but the way they are parading themselves around one would think their master “brewer” came up with this shit! Zain over posed with the “blackberry”, one would be forgiven if he thought they were made at their Wampewo offices.
So because we haven’t un-val anything, no material from me, plus, this post really has no direction, just to keep the bloody blog alive!! Out!
1 comment:
Ha! Spoken like a true Windows consumer. Seriously, once you go Apple, you realise how Bill Gates has had you doing kimaansulo for all hackers, viruses and those Russian girlfriends.
Now, if I had PMS, I would really have more to say about this post... Alas!
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